There were once days where I was productive, feeling accomplishment with every day in and out. Now its just wasted time. I could be doing much more with myself, but mentally I can not.
I need to get my shit in gear, get away from the same old ruts, the same stupid problem. Learn to think outside the box, and outside my mind. Its way to one tracked and it causes problems. At work and at home.
Once I think about one thing no matter what it is, it is all that is in my mind at that time. There are no other thoughts about anything else.
This may be a blessing, but at the same time it is a disease.
When will I learn how to think and become less forgetful.
When will I wake up and continue to grow as an individual.... as a person.
Without school disciplining myself and my mind, what will now. How will I grow into a better person who is more in tune with himself. Not just to get better with school and work, but for her as well.
It is this very thing that makes her feel distant from me, but there is no way I can fix it.
Not at this time.... Not until I reach that next level.
There is tremendous amounts of potential in me, and I need to someway break it loose.
Enough if wasting my time!
or is it just more talk... or will I do it?
